Today Adam asks, “Just where do babies come from?”
Ladies & Gentlemen of all ages, boys & girls – welcome back once again to “The Weeksly Late Edition”, the only column on Moviehole that dares ask the eternal question: “Just where do babies come from?” Is it holding hands? Are they delivered by storks? Is it something that a 28 year old married guy like myself should know by now? Chances are that it’s a question that will not be covered in tonight’s edition of:
My Television Is Trying To Kill Me
It’s another Friday night, and as you all know, that means only one thing to me, “Survivor: Guatemala”, the show that kicks ass and doesn’t stop to take names. Tonight’s sweat-fest found the competing tribes of “Yaxha” & “Nakum” playing a weird-ass game that looked a little bit like Netball, a little bit like Basketball, and a little bit fucking strange.
Gotta give the boys and girls credit though, they busted their asses off in 45.5 degree heat (114 Fahrenheit), but at the end of the day, Yaxha screwed the pooch and ended up having to vote out another P.Y.T in Brianna Varela, the 21 year old “Retail Sales / Make-Up Artist” (counter chick) in a tasty 7-1 vote, which was probably due to stating that her favourite sport is “Basketball”, but couldn’t understand what a “pick” meant during the challenge. It’s a conspiracy I tell ya! They’re voting off the hot chicks first! This weeks pick for the “Guatemala” winner – Gary.
I should have made mention of it again last week, but I wanted to remind all of you Aussie viewers that “Rescue Me”, the fantastic Denis Leary drama about NYC Firefighters is now screening on “FOX 8” at 8:30pm, each & every Monday night. To make the deal just that extra bit crisp & tasty for you, they also follow it up with commercial free episodes of “The Shield”, so if you have to do it, tape “Grey’s Anatomy” or “Numb3rs”, but make sure you’re tuned in for this great show.
Alright, short and sweet this week, so this last one is an absolute doozy, so if you don’t want the start of “Alias: Season 5” spoiled for you, you’ve got around five seconds to scroll down past this tidbit, straight to “The Rehash”:
*BIG ASS SPOILER* R.I.P. Michael Vaughn *END OF BIG ASS SPOILER*
Topher & Tom
Adding a little more fuel to the fire surrounding the identity of the “Spider-Man 3” villain(s) was Mary-Jane herself, Kirsten Dunst, who fresh from shopping for pre-natal vitamins, got a little bit loopy and let slip that Topher Grace & Thomas Haden Church are indeed playing “Venom” & “Sandman” respectively….. I really like Topher, but I’m thinking that the guy must be putting on some serious muscle as we speak, unless we’re talking big time CGI here.
The Cone Of Silence
It was only two weeks back that I talked about the loss of Bob Denver right here, and this week we’ve lost another classic performer in Don Adams, the star of “Get Smart” & the voice of “Inspector Gadget”. “Get Smart” was one of the first television shows that I ever saw on a regular basis some 20+ years ago on daytime TV, but I loved it back then, and still do today….. he was a true gentleman, and he’ll be very much missed.
Man…….. Wyatt got old..
The Most Salacious Piece Of Tabloid Gossip This Week
Ah, adulterous love. I’d be alright working with Angelina Jolie myself, my wife knows full well that she’s not on my “Celebrity List” (don’t lie, you know what kind of list I’m talking about), however, not everyone can escape the trap of a bit of fun nookie, but who knew it would lead to wedding bells? You can imagine my shock when I saw this little ditty over at the IMDB:
Clooney: “I’m Not Hosting a Pitt-Jolie Wedding”
Hollywood actor George Clooney is stunned by reports he’s planning to host a supposed wedding between his pal Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie at his Italian villa. Tabloids have reported that Mr. And Mrs .Smith co-stars Pitt and Jolie are set to wed in a private ceremony on Clooney’s sprawling property by Lake Como, but the actor insists nothing of the sort is planned. He says, “People have said they were going to get married at my house. Well, I would know, and I can tell you there’s not going to be a secret wedding. I’ve met Angelina – I like her very much – but I would never talk about whether they are together or not. I don’t speak of my own personal life – I would never speak of my friends.” In fact, Clooney adds, he and his Ocean’s Eleven co-star Pitt don’t even speak to each other about their romantic exploits. He explains, “Brad and I have been friends for a long time and we don’t talk about his relationships or his life, so I learn mostly about things that are going on in his personal life through magazines.”
Ah well, maybe they’ll hold a double wedding with Matt & Luciana….
The Official Weeks Seal Of Approval DVD Release Of The Week
Well, this week was certainly a big old crap-fest when it came to DVD’s, but the good news is that it could have been any week at all, and my pick for the best release would have been the same. I refer to, of course, “The Simpsons: Season 6”.
20th Century Fox have always done a fantastic job when it comes to “The Simpsons” & “Futurama”, by cramming them full of every conceivable bit of goodness available, and Season 6 is no different, with the now standard commentaries on every episode by Cast & Crew, Featurettes, Deleted Scenes, Animatics & Sketches. But the truly great thing about this is some of the best episodes to yet screen with the likes of “Bart Of Darkness”, “Sideshow Bob Roberts”, “Grandpa vs. Sexual Inadequacy”, “Bart vs. Australia”, “Two Dozen and One Greyhounds” & “Who Shot Mr. Burns?” filling up the 4 discs in beautiful style. So what if you’ve seen them all before…. You still watch them every time they’re on the telly, so quit yer bitchin’ and get it now!
Before I forget, I also want you peeps to get over to the official “Titanic” DVD site when you get a chance, and get a sample of just a few special features that are going to be on offer this November. Make sure you take a crack at the Trivia game while you’re there, and see if you can unlock all of the Deleted Scenes that they have – trust me, it’s definitely worth it.
The Funniest Friggin’ Thing I’ve Seen This Week
You’ve all got a computer (duh!), and if you’re reading this column on this site, chances are you’re a big fan of Movies (double duh!), so I think you’re gonna like this new little piece of home entertainment coming your way. Wing your way over to the “Trailers” section once you’re there to watch some pretty funny shit. I can’t wait!
Questions, comments or just witty banter to offer? You can get a hold of yours truly right here.
Until next Friday night, be good, be happy, and be safe.