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Black Christmas (DVD)

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If you’d care for me to pick at it, I could, and we’d never finish. The script is a shambles; the pacing is off; the performances are as weak as piss and the tone is all-wrong.


Michelle Trachtenberg, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Katie Cassidy, Lacey Chabert, Crystal Lowe

Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle all the way
These horror remakes are so tired, I’m glad I
Don’t have to pay…

The only person who’d wish these slipshod seconds upon the smiling faces of teenagers is well, the Grinch (or some green-eyed studio exec that still hasn’t figured out the art vs. commerce balance).

Atop of Santa’s sack this festive season is a remake of the cult B horror pic “Black Christmas, and I tell ya, I assume I’d rather scoff some outdated egg-nog than give it another thought. That’s only partly true.

Ya see critics everywhere have been savaging this thing like it just attacked their cat. In all honesty, it isn’t that bad – well, no worse than an “I Know What You Did Last Summer” or “Urban Legend” sequel. It ain’t hot, but it’s not exactly cold either. Thanks to the craftiness of director Glenn Morgan (“Final Destination”), there’s actually several moments of inspired fun.

Emphasis seems to be much more on gore than suspense with the 2006 remake of Bob Clark’s cult classic. Same storyline as the original – only with a bit more back-story about our killer thrown in – a psychopath returns to the house he grew up in to knock off the girls that live there now. That’s about it. It’s entertaining fluff.

Granted, it ain’t half the film the original was. That was thrilling. This isn’t. At most, this is just a laughably ludicrous movie that you can’t help but keep watching because it’s played so over-the-top; has a gorgeous cast and encompasses some lush production values.

If you’d care for me to pick at it, I could, and we’d never finish. The script is a shambles; the pacing is off; the performances are as weak as piss and the tone is all-wrong.

Still, I got through it – expecting the worst teenage horror film ever; I think that claim still lies with either “Valentine”; “Fear Dot Com” or “Long Time Dead” – so it can’t all be bad.

Extras include a very frank chat with the director about how and why he got involved in the remake; a fairly detailed behind-the-scenes making-of; some deleted and alternate scenes

Rating :
Reviewer : Clint Morris

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About Caffeinated Clint

Clint is the creator, editor and maintainer of Moviehole.

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