By Clint Morris
When someone in a funky suit guts a pumpkin on Halloween youâ€™re generally left with a rather hollow shell with only a trickle of tasty stuff still left inside.
In this case, the dude in the funky suit would be The Weinstein Company, and the trickle of tasty stuff theyâ€™ve left inside the rather bare cadaver of â€œSoul Menâ€ can merely be attributed to its entertaining leads.
Ladies and gents, not much here to see at all – – which is sad, considering itâ€™s the last major film for both Bernie Mac and Isaac Hayes.
Mac and Samuel L.Jackson play, well, the African American equivalents of Walter Matthau and Jack Lemmonâ€™s â€œGrumpy Old Menâ€ â€“ only these two can hold a tune.
Ya see, theyâ€™re former members of a Motown-style group that are forced to reunite for a one-off reunion show to salute itâ€™s fallen member (who they werenâ€™t too fond of, considering he quit the band to become a solo artist of the height of their fame). Cue the clichÃ©d stop-offâ€™s (to meet estranged daughters), recurring villains (a wannabe musician who wants revenge on the boys for breaking some of his bones), and the always-necessary trip to prison.
â€œSoul Menâ€ is fun enough, and the boys bounce well off each other, but thereâ€™s just nothing in this thinly-written road-trip comedy. The set-up is quite good, and you suspect thereâ€™s going to be some fun times ahead, but they just never come â€“ it just plods along to the finish line.
I still remember Jackson telling me at the Snakes on a Plane junket at Comic Con a few years back that he chose to do that film based solely on the title (â€œwhen I read that title, I knew I wanted to do it! â€œSnake on a Plane!? â€“ thatâ€™s all I needed!â€), not the script. After seeing some of the crap heâ€™s been in lately, I believe it. The man obviously doesnâ€™t pick his projects based on how solid their storyline is, or who else is involved, but instead whether theyâ€™ve got an interesting title (and, assumingly, whether or not they pay well) or mock teaser-poster.
â€œSoul Menâ€ mightnâ€™t be the flashiest of titles (in fact, one might mistake it for the long-awaited sequel to the C.Thomas Howell comedy of the late 80s) but it does have a reasonably intriguing premise – – maybe thatâ€™s what snagged Samâ€™s interest this time â€˜round? Or maybe he simply assumed, from the title, that itâ€™d be his big chance to sing? Whatever the case, the man needs someone to get his career back on track â€“ heâ€™s picking duds like a tight-ass hubby at a thrift storeâ€¦. Sloppily, rushed, and with the bottom-dollar firmly in mind the whole time.
A so-so commentary, a tribute to both Hayes & Mac, several behind-the-scenes featurettes, and Bernie Mac- doing what he does best – at The Apollo.
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Against the Current - the band, not adventures in dangerous swimming 101
Zedd - If our love is tragedy, why are you my remedy? (Well, answer my question!)
Arrow (Okay, Felicity from Arrow!)
Chrissy Costanza (cat eyes and buttery lyrics!)
Girls (TV) (Okay, Allison Williams!)
Movies - especially when they play in the dark.
Twin Peaks (TV)
Friends (TV) (It had me at "No way are you cool enough to pull Clint"; damn straight, Chandler!)
Traveling - preferably where water is, so I can splash someone!
Star Wars trilogy - no, the other one, fella!
Alex G - far more talented than her younger brother Alex H
Cameron Crowe movies - Say Anything..., Jerry Maguire, Almost Famous
The sign 'Free Wi-Fi'.
Reenacting dance/song scenes from "Grease" with my little girl (hey! Wait till you see my 'Summer Lovin'! - don't judge)
Die Hard - 40 stories of Sheer Adventure!
Alex Goot & Friends (his enemies aren't half as talented!)
Cooking up a nice dish and sitting in the entertainment area, on a cool night, basking in it's greatness.
Inflatable kids pools full of Vodka Lime Crush.
Acidic Email from angry, over passionate teenagers after I trash something "Twilight"-related on the site. Sparkle elsewhere.
My baby girl's big, caring heart.