Stephen King didn’t know they were doing a Stand movie

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Neither Warner Bros or CBS films contacted author Stephen King to let them know they’d be bringing his novel “The Stand” to the big screen. Though ostensibly not pissed, King still has some advice for the studios in terms of how they’re going to approach said film.

Talking to EW, King said the film can’t be a two-hour movie, it’s too hard of a job to shrink it, and suggests they do a trilogy of films.

“Historically speaking, movie studios blow the budget on things like this, so maybe it’ll be fun to look at,” King said. “The dough certainly isn’t going to me, although if it is a trilogy, and if it makes a lot of money, I might be able to buy a chicken dinner at Popeye’s. Great slaw!”

As for casting, King has a few ideas (that will probably got unnoticed by the studio).

”No one will be able to top Gary Sinise, who played Stu Redman in the original ABC miniseries. He was perfect. When he says “You don’t know nothing” to the soldiers who are putting him under mandatory quarantine, you believe his contempt completely. My runner-up pick would be Jake Gyllenhaal.”

King also suggests Billy Bob Thornton would make a good trash man (that’s a character in the film, King isn’t recommending Thornton quit his day job).

King, seemingly remarking on some of the lesser-inspired casting of the original mini-series, adds “Molly Ringwald will probably not play the Trashcan Man” and “M-O-O-N, that spells “you probably won’t see this anytime soon.” And when you do, Woody Allen won’t be directing it. Or Molly Ringwald.”

Molly wasn’t that bad.