By Drew Turney
For such accomplished actors in the action and thriller genres, it’s amazing how banal this action thriller is.
Although when you look deeper, Robert De Niro hasn’t given us a role worthy of his talent since ”Heat” in 1995, Jason Statham is this century’s Arnold Schwarzenegger (he can only play Jason Statham) and Clive Owen’s always struck me as having ideas above his station when it comes to his talents. So on reflection, maybe it’s the perfect film for an automaton, a has-been and a wannabe.
Either way Jason is a mercenary for hire when his mentor and partner (De Niro) is captured by bad guys who want to blackmail him into doing that most hoary of cinematic tropes, One Final Job. He and his team of B list Australian actors (it was all shot in and around Melbourne) have to track down a gang of murderous British SAS soldiers who killed the sons of a powerful Arabic nobleman in battle or he’ll kill the old man.
Nothing about it puts a foot wrong, but for the same reason nothing about it stands out. It’s based (probably by the merest of connections) to some sort of true story set in the early 80s, and it all amounts to a lot of noise and all three doing what they do best (or just as accurately, worst). Produced by Omnilab media, it’s another failed example of Australian filmmakers trying to make American movies.
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Against the Current - the band, not adventures in dangerous swimming 101
Zedd - If our love is tragedy, why are you my remedy? (Well, answer my question!)
Arrow (Okay, Felicity from Arrow!)
Chrissy Costanza (cat eyes and buttery lyrics!)
Girls (TV) (Okay, Allison Williams!)
Movies - especially when they play in the dark.
Twin Peaks (TV)
Friends (TV) (It had me at "No way are you cool enough to pull Clint"; damn straight, Chandler!)
Traveling - preferably where water is, so I can splash someone!
Star Wars trilogy - no, the other one, fella!
Alex G - far more talented than her younger brother Alex H
Cameron Crowe movies - Say Anything..., Jerry Maguire, Almost Famous
The sign 'Free Wi-Fi'.
Reenacting dance/song scenes from "Grease" with my little girl (hey! Wait till you see my 'Summer Lovin'! - don't judge)
Die Hard - 40 stories of Sheer Adventure!
Alex Goot & Friends (his enemies aren't half as talented!)
Cooking up a nice dish and sitting in the entertainment area, on a cool night, basking in it's greatness.
Inflatable kids pools full of Vodka Lime Crush.
Acidic Email from angry, over passionate teenagers after I trash something "Twilight"-related on the site. Sparkle elsewhere.
My baby girl's big, caring heart.