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Scary Movie 5 Spoilers, anyone!?

Who dies in the pre-credits opening sequence, and which Expendable will appear?

Yep, spoilers for “Scary Movie 5”. Almost a void header, normally.

Like the “Scream” films they were [originally] based on, the “Scary Movie” films also feature ‘opening kills’ – the opening of “Scary Movie 3”, where Shaquille O’Neal and Dr. Phil were offed before the movie really began, comes to my mind first. Anyway, this is where the spoilers come in.

In the upcoming “Scary Movie 5”, two famous faces will bite it in the pre-credit sequence.

** Spoiler Alert **

Charlie Sheen and Lindsay Lohan.

THR says the duo are playing, rather absurdly, “the world’s hottest new couple” (is that hottest? or most frightening?).

Besides the on-screen deaths of the “Anger Management” and “Mean Girls” stars, respectively, the film will also make room for an Expendable.

Terry Crews.

Crews, in this week’s “Expendables 2”, tells Blackfilm that “That’s being directed by my man Malcolm Lee, who I love from The Best Man.”

And if you’ve heard nothing about the plot so far, this might be news to you too :

“Scary Movie 5” is mostly a spoof of dance-centric films like “Step Up” and “Black Swan” and fixes on three dancers, two newbies among them, who are competing for the lead in a production, a role that’s to be chosen by the snooty director.

Ashley Tisdale and Erica Ash have the main parts.

Though Anna Faris isn’t returning (well, there’s still the chance of a cameo I guess?), some of the “Scary Movie” folks are said to be – including Craig Bierko and Anthony Anderson.

“Scary Movie 5” begins filming September.

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