Kevin Smith went all Vin Diesel today, using Facebook to pimp and garner up excitement for some of his future projects – one of which we’ve never heard of before, “Helena Handbag”.
Smith, in addition to confirming a “Clerks III”, says he won’t be whoring himself out anytime in the near future. His “Cop Out” days are behind him.
“[F]rom now until I drop dead, I’m only ever gonna make a flick that only I would/could ever make,” Smith posted today to his Facebook page. “‘Jersey Girl,’ ‘Zack & Miri,’ ‘Cop Out’ – while I love them all, these are movies anybody could make. Like ‘em or hate ‘em, nobody else but me could’ve (or would’ve) ever made ‘Clerks’. Or ‘Chasing Amy’. Or ‘Dogma’. Or ‘Red State’. Or ‘Clerks II’. Or ‘Mallrats’. Or ‘Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back’. I let my view askew get standardized for awhile there – so much so that I was happy to walk away from it all for three years and do other s–t. But after conceiving and shooting ‘Tusk’ in less than 6 months (with the help of a s–t ton of amazing professionals and a budget smaller than that of ‘Red State’), I realized that film isn’t in my blood… MY films are in my blood. And some of ‘em are still in there, so I better get ‘em out!”
“Helena Handbag”, he says, “concerns mankind teaming up with Hell to save existence from extinction at the hands of a Rapturing giant Jesus – which means the budget has to be LOW, because NOBODY’S gonna wanna make that movie. At all. And I know this going in, so I won’t be heartbroken if it never goes beyond the script. But… if the script is funny enough? Who knows?”
Next is “Clerks III”, which Smith said they hope to shoot in May.
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Against the Current - the band, not adventures in dangerous swimming 101
Zedd - If our love is tragedy, why are you my remedy? (Well, answer my question!)
Arrow (Okay, Felicity from Arrow!)
Chrissy Costanza (cat eyes and buttery lyrics!)
Girls (TV) (Okay, Allison Williams!)
Movies - especially when they play in the dark.
Twin Peaks (TV)
Friends (TV) (It had me at "No way are you cool enough to pull Clint"; damn straight, Chandler!)
Traveling - preferably where water is, so I can splash someone!
Star Wars trilogy - no, the other one, fella!
Alex G - far more talented than her younger brother Alex H
Cameron Crowe movies - Say Anything..., Jerry Maguire, Almost Famous
The sign 'Free Wi-Fi'.
Reenacting dance/song scenes from "Grease" with my little girl (hey! Wait till you see my 'Summer Lovin'! - don't judge)
Die Hard - 40 stories of Sheer Adventure!
Alex Goot & Friends (his enemies aren't half as talented!)
Cooking up a nice dish and sitting in the entertainment area, on a cool night, basking in it's greatness.
Inflatable kids pools full of Vodka Lime Crush.
Acidic Email from angry, over passionate teenagers after I trash something "Twilight"-related on the site. Sparkle elsewhere.
My baby girl's big, caring heart.