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Two-and-A-Half-Men finale : Where’s Charlie?

So, after months of speculation that Charlie Harper might indeed come back for the swansong, tonight’s “Two and-a-half Men” finale didn’t feature a Charlie Sheen reprise.

While creator Chuck Lorre did offer Sheen the chance to come back for the show’s final episode, the “Anger Management” actor decided he’d rather piss Tiger Blood than tango with Ashton Kutcher. Or Something.

The episode toyed with viewers, offering a storyline that hinted Charlie Harper was still alive. Arnold Schwarzenegger and Christian Slater even made cameos to help the story along. The jabs at Sheen happened left, right, and center (the episode’s worth watching just for the in jokes), and the hints that we might see Sheen kept coming, but at the end of the day, the only former series regular to make a reprise would be Angus T.Jones, reprising Jake.

Creator Lorre made an appearance at the end of the episode (after dropping a piano on top of an actor that’s supposed to look like Sheen); sitting in his director’s chair, he turns to the camera and says ‘winning’. Ouch! Only then, another piano drops from the sky and lands on Lorre.

On the Vanity Card at the end of the credits, Lorre wrote :

“I know a lot of you might be disappointed that you didn’ t get to see Charlie Sheen in tonight’ s finale. For the record, he was offered a role. Our idea was to have him walk up to the front door in the last scene, ring the doorbell, then turn, look directly into the camera and go off on a maniacal rant about the dangers of drug abuse. He would then explain that these dangers only applied to average people. That he was far from average. He was a ninja warrior from Mars. He was invincible.

And then we would drop a piano on him.

We thought it was funny.

He didn’t.

Instead, he wanted us to write a heart warming scene that would set up his return to primetime TV in a new sitcom called The Harpers starring him and Jon Cryer.

We thought that was funny too.”

Sheen himself declared his non-involvement on the episode on Thursday, instead promoting his appearance (reprising his “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off” character) on another sitcom “The Goldbergs” :

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