Caffeinated Clint
There must be a shitty Westend Soap titled “Dead Man Wear No Tails” or “Wed Man Tell No Tales” or “Dead Man Ride No Whales” (actually, I think I caught that on Cinemax the other night) because Disney are renaming their next “Pirates of the Caribbean” flick for the UK.
The film known as “Pirates of the Caribbean : Dead Men Tell No Tales” around the rest of the world (except in Australia where it’ll be renamed “screw you, Pistol and Boo!”) will get a swanky new name in Queen’s country.
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According to our friends at Den of Geek, Disney will be treating folks in the UK to a movie titled “Pirates of the Caribbean: Salazar’s Revenge” while in France, Italy, and Spain cinemagoers will be lining up to see “Pirates of the Caribbean: The Revenge of Salazar”.
Salazar refers to Javier Bardem’s character from the film. That’s his name. That’s what his momma called him. He’s bad.
What’s likely happened is that the film committees of the respective territories have noticed that someone else has the rights to use the name “Dead Men Tell No Tales” – be it a film studio, clothing brand or fat-dripping burger chain – and have let Disney know that they’re going to have to get a new name for it. It could also be the case that the studio’s marketing team decided that the movie needed a snazzier title – possibly feeling that paying twenty bucks to see mute “Dead Men” on the big screen didn’t sound too appealing.
The film, which opens in May of next year (maybe to a whimper, considering the reduced interest in the rigid franchise), brings back star Johnny Depp as cinema’s most inane, alcoholic swashbuckler. Orlando Bloom was rumoured to be returning for the thing too, but chances are the penis that stands in as a sail on his boat didn’t arrive on set in time.
