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Kick-Ass Breakdowns

These just landed on my [friggin messy] desk.

No, not the rubber-banded bunch of letters marked ‘Overdue’… these, the character breakdowns for Matthew Vaughan’s “Kick-Ass”.

Though most of the parts have now been booked – Aaron Johnson plays the lead – these might give you a better insight into who’s playing who.

Chris D’Amico: CHRISTOPHER MINTZ-PLASSE HAS BOOKED THIS ROLE. 17 and self-conscious, the over-protected son of mobster Frank D’Amico, Chris is another comic book addict — only he’s trapped in a cocoon of wealth, can’t associate with the other geeks, and is in fact a lonely, sociopathic kid. Desperate to inherit his father’s corrupt criminal empire, but treated like a kid by his dad, Chris sees a chance to shine when Frank demands the destruction of teen superhero Kickass. Intent on luring Kickass into a trap (but also interested in having a famous costumed superhero for a buddy), Chris gets his father to front the money for his transformation into Red Mist — only by the time all is said and done, Chris is well on his way to become a demonic supervillain. Lead

Katie Deauxma: LYNDSY FONSECA HAS BOOKED THIS PART. A strikingly cute girl in Dave’s class. Katie is the object of Dave’s quiet infatuation. The kind of girl whose friends are all damaged in some way (and who volunteers at a clinic supplying addicts with clean needles), Katie befriends Dave only after most of his major bones are broken. Wrongly believing Dave to be gay, Katie makes him her new best friend and confidant, and is quite shocked to learn that he’s not only straight, he’s a costumed superhero. Lead;

Damon Macready (Big Daddy): NICOLAS CAGE HAS BOOKED THIS PART. 35, Caucasian, big and ripped and soft-spoken, with a killer handlebar mustache. He’s the father of 11 years old Mindy. Once an honest cop who ran afoul of druglord Frank D’Amico, he was framed, sent to prison, and widowed when his financially strapped wife killed herself. Blaming Frank for all his troubles, Damon has gone quietly crazy, and has trained his little daughter to be a lethal weapon, adept at all forms of armed combat, his deadly sidekick in every way. Damon transforms himself and Mindy into a crimefighting duo of big Daddy and Hitgirl, and they set out to pull down Frank D’Amico’s criminal empire, henchman by henchman, until only Frank himself is left, naked to his enemies. Lead;

Mindy Macready: CHLOE MORETZ HAS BOOKED THIS ROLE 11. The tiny daughter of Damon Macready. She’s an intense girl who has been raised by her father to be the perfect sidekick for a costumed superhero. Expert with hand to hand combat, edged weapons and guns, Mindy is a ferocious, pottymouthed terror — but she uses her power only to fight evildoers. Intent on avenging the Macready family’s vendetta against Frank D’Amico and his criminal empire, Mindy uses her skills to chop down Frank’s thuggish henchmen, one by one, and amasses a mighty high body count for an 11 years old. Lead;

Frank D’Amico: 50s. Chris’s father. Frank is the volatile and ruthless head of a Jersey crime syndicate — only things are falling apart. Unable to handle stress well, Frank is intent on finding out which rival has been stealing his cocaine shipments, and has no idea that a costumed superhero with a personal vendetta is trying to take his organization apart, piece by piece. Cracking under the strain, Frank is wrongly convinced that hapless teen superhero Kickass is his real nemesis, and he agrees to let his son masquerade as a rival teen superhero in order to force Kickass into the open. But Frank is late in figuring out the identity of his real enemy, and when he finally deduces that he’s under attack by the arguably-insane Macready family, it’s almost too late for Frank to fight back — because most of his goons are dead. Lead;

Detective Marcus Williams: 37, a handsome African-American cop. Marcus used to be the partner of Damon Macready, and in fact reared Mindy while Damon was in prison. Well aware of Damon’s vendetta against the D’Amico crime syndicate, Marcus quickly deduces that Damon is behind the brutal attacks on D’Amico’s henchmen. But Marcus has no intention of putting Damon behind bars again, and prefers to let Big Daddy and Hitgirl work without the interference of the law — for Marcus strongly suspects that the destruction of Frank D’Amico and his rotten organization is in the best interests of justice. Lead; Big Joe: The right hand man of Frank D’Amico, Big Joe is a tough criminal who thinks he has seen it all — but in fact, he’s never seen a real crime syndicate under attack by a pair of costumed superheroes, and he finds the experience quite baffling. Intent on protecting Frank from his worst impulses, Big Joe sees D’Amico spinning out of control under the pressure of relentless defeat. But when Big Joe tries once too often to stop Frank from committing a pointless execution, he winds up killed by his over-irritable boss. Lead;

Marty: About 17, a chubby Caucasian high school student who loves comic books. He is Dave’s funny best friend. Together with Dave and Todd, he loves to go to comic book stores, and checks out the latest issues, while talking about school, girls, the futility of teenaged life, and the exciting adventures of Myspace insta-celebrity Kickass. He never suspects that Kickass is in fact Dave Lizewski — and neither would you if you knew Dave. Lead;

Todd: About 17. Dave’s best friend, another geek / dweeb / dork. Todd is another high school student who loves comic books. Together with Dave and Marty, he loves to go to comic book stores, and checks out the latest issues, while talking about school, girls, the futility of teenaged life and the exciting adventures of Myspace insta-celebrity Kickass. He never suspects that Kickass is in fact Dave Lizewski — and neither would you if you knew Dave. Lead;

Mr. Lizewski: 40s. He is Dave’s father. Widowed when his wife dies of an aneurysm at the kitchen table, he’s rather sad and quiet afterwards. Regularly seen taking Dave to school, he’s deeply worried when Dave is almost killed in a mugging / car accident. Drained from this experience, he believes that Dave is a bit hapless (hardly superhero material), and urges him to get a taser for personal protection;

Detective Vic Gigante: 50s. A crooked cop with a sweaty neck, he’s in Frank D’Amico’s pay, and is under his thumb. When Frank orders him to find the vigilante who is destroying his drug operation, Gigante reluctantly complies, over the strenuous objections of Marcus Williams. Later, intent on catching Kickass, Gigante winds up exposed as one of D’Amico’s business associates, and his career in police work is over;

Mrs. Zane: 40, a slightly chubby borderline MILF. She is one of Dave’s high school teachers, and she figures prominently in his sexual fantasies. She is secretly flattered when she catches Dave staring at her breasts;

Tre Fernandez: 30, a petty criminal who’s “unlikely to join his Neighborhood watch anytime soon,” he’s a member of Frank D’Amico’s crime organization, who insists that the latest drug shipment was stolen by a costumed superhero — a story so ridiculous that it earns Tre a death sentence;

Oscar Juarez: 26, Hispanic. This terrified man runs for his life from a street gang, only to be accidentally knocked flat by Kickass. He’s deeply grateful moments later, when Kickass beats up his attackers;

Danil: 30, a rather battered Russian mobster. He’s questioned / tortured by Big Joe and winds up microwaved to death;

Rasul: 19, Hispanic, cute but wasted. This ex-boyfriend of Katie’s has been making a pest of himself, and he’s tracked down in a drug den by Kickass and ordered to lay off. He winds up killed by Mindy;

Dimitri: 30. This Russian thug in Frank’s gang is captured by Hitgirl and Big Daddy and is shoved into a junkyard crusher after he tells all he knows;

Erika Cho: Asian. She is Katie’s best friend and confidante, regularly seen at high school;

Gang Kids #1 & #2: These two tough gang kids demand cellphones and money from Dave and Todd. Later, attacked by Kickass, they are initially beaten — then fight back and put Dave in the hospital.

Pop star to Bring it On

Mulcahy to Give ’em Hell, Malone!