Caffeinated Clint
Each and every year a dozen or so gems go unnoticed, slipping in and out of the cinemas quicker than a mistress does into a closet once the wife’s car pulls in. This year there were plenty of good flicks that were treated like the geeky, chess-playing introvert at the school dance – and shouldn’t have been. You really should’ve asked the following to dance…
10. Remember Me
I know, I know, ‘but it’s got that guy with more gunk in his hair than Liz Hurley does in her nether regions’ but c’mon! many-a-good-actor have started out in the cinematic mailroom and graduated to an awe-impressive high-rise suite – just look at Robin ‘Mork’ Williams, Josh ‘Goonies’ Brolin, Tom ‘Bosom Buddies’ Hanks or Stephen ‘Evil Ed’ Geoffries! (Ok, bad example) – ain’t Robert Pattinson innocent until the gavel slams down!? This film, a heartrending relationship drama (it’s both about the rapport between a young couple and also one between a young man and his estranged father) that played to the tick of a 9/11 countdown, proved there’s much more to “Twilight” vamp Robert Pattinson than blank stares, sparkles and tree hopping. Quite simply, Pattinson was an eye-opener in this film. Skeptics need see it.
9. Scott Pilgrim vs. The World
Quite possibly the best video-game movie ever made…. That’s, funnily enough, not based on a video game. The problem with Edgar Wright’s film adaptation of the popular comic was that it’s, quite honestly, too original. Today’s audiences like to be spoonfed the same dull-tasting comfort food, and even from the trailers (not to mention early pics of Mary Elizabeth Winstead’s funky amethyst tresses), it was clear we were in store for anything but (‘’Couples Retreat’’). Some of you really need to get out more often and experience the wonders that cinema has to offer.
8. Let Me In
I abhor remakes as much as the next cinema studies grad, but if you avoided Matt Reeves’ English-language remake of Swedish hit Let ‘’The Right One In’’ for that reason – that it was a do-over – and that reason only, you’ve just robbed yourself of a mighty good time. More so, you missed one of the best performances of the year – Chloe Moretz, amazingly frosty but incontrovertibly likable, as a pre-teen vampire with issues. Catch it on DVD.
7. Buried
“If I wanted to see Ryan Reynolds in a box, I’d try and snag a copy of that porn tape that he and Scarlett apparently recorded in their honeymoon” I hear you say? Quicker route to climax here, believe me. Much more wood to be had in this chilling, highly-original thriller about a chap who awakens to find himself buried in a coffin with nothing but a flat mobile phone (Should really have been an iphone; more credible that it’d be flat) and a lighter. Reynolds delivered his best performance (since the ‘nip/tuck’ work he displayed in “Buying the Cow”) and 2010 scored its first ‘real’ ending.
6. The A-Team
You all rushed to see “The Flintstones” movie – which turned out to be about as enjoyable as a rimjob from a toothy zombie – but for some inane reason decided to stay away from a good adaptation of a classic TV series!? Director Joe Carnahan’s “A-Team” movie was, quite simply, the action movie of the year. More so, it encompassed loads of laughs, oozed with charm, and a friggin’ great aerial dogfight – in a tank. Pity the fool.
5. Hatchi : A Dog’s Tale
Though released in the states in 2009, the Richard Gere starrer didn’t actually hit local shores until 2010 so that’s why it’s included here. Boy, y’all missed out on a great tearjerker here and, believe it or not, a real tour-de-force from the ex-American Gigolo. Inspired by the true story of a dog that waited for years and years at a train station for his owner to arrive (not realizing he had died) it’s… oh man, I can’t even talk about it, it’s so touching.
4. The Crazies
Breck Eisner’s remake of the old George Romero Coffin Dodgers flick disappeared quicker than Shane Warne at a feminist’s luncheon and yet “Resident Evil 500” sticks around for weeks on end, raking up big bucks!? Yeah, someone definitely needs to check the water! Starring Radha Mitchell and Timothy Olyphant, “The Crazies” is one of the most thrilling, most interesting and appreciably unashamedly gory flicks to come along since, er, “If these Walls Could Talk 2”. Rent! Rent! Rent!
3. Brooklyn’s Finest
Antoine Fuqua skips the slop and whacks the whack with this compelling, gritty and marvelously performed crime drama that plays not unlike Scorsese’s acclaimed – and successful – “Departed”. Obviously the U.S courts didn’t catch it or they’d have likely not been so hard on Wesley Snipes – who gives one of his most impressive performances in years here.
2. Going the Distance
I’ve much respect for Drew Barrymore. The girl’s been around long enough to know what makes a good movie, and now that she’s getting a say at the table, seems determined nothing unspool’s with her name attached that’s broke. “Going the Distance”, a seemingly fairly ho-hum looking/sounding rom-com co-starring Justin Long, might just be one of the funniest films of 2010 – it’s definitely not the film you (or Katherine Heigl’s umpteen fans) were expecting. Again, thanks Drew!
1.The Joneses
A flick starring David Duchovny and Demi Moore as patriarchs of a fake family placed in the suburbs to market products to their unsuspecting neighbours? Sounds about as exciting as having your pitts waxed by Richard Simmons, right? Sure, this one stings, but in a good way – on top of its many humorous and touching moments, there’s a killer message here that’ll hit some hard. Ya know, you really should try the hazelnut – it’s got more kick than ol’ Vanilla?
