Caffeinated Clint
And your chance to win “28 Weeks Later” and “Hills Have Eyes 2”
As ‘’28 Days Later’’ and its sequel, ‘’28 Weeks Later’’, launch an airborne virus, Rage, which stimulates in its victims a bout of extraordinarily frenzied violence, we explore another five movie viruses, what they are and how to survive them. If you can…
The Andromeda Strain
Origin: The Andromeda Strain, 1971
Symptoms: A severe bout of blood-clotting that proves so severe, the blood turns to powder. Thankfully, victims show a propensity for suicide, which while normally abhorrent, is rather useful in this situation.
Treatment: The likes of Lindsay Lohan and Britney Spears might survive, as severe alcohol intake seems to infect the blood and make it an unsuitable host for the virus.
Odds of survival: None. Unless you like a good stint of binge-drinking…
The Bio-Weapon
Origin: The Omega Man, 1971
Symptoms: Instant death is common, although those lucky enough to survive that fate are then unlucky enough to suffer mutation, albinism, techno-phobia and delusions of grandeur!
Treatment: The only human to have a vaccine before the apocalypse, good old Charlton Heston has the antidote throbbing through his veins. So some sort vaccine concocted from his blood should do the trick!
Odds of survival: Nil. Unless you happen to be Charlton Heston.
Motaba
Origin: Outbreak, 1995
Symptoms: What starts with a bit of flu, plus accompanying aches and pains, then turns into severe haemorrhaging before a severe bout of death.
Treatment: To prevent the victim from bleeding out of every orifice, they must be treated with a synthesised vaccine. And to get that, scientists need to track down the cheeky monkey that started the whole shebang!
Odd of survival: Nil. Unless you’re good at catching at monkeys, or have a scientist and team to do it for you…
Chimera
Origin: Mission: Impossible II (2000)
Symptoms: The pharmaceutical corporation BioCyte engineered a chimera virus to create a need for their vaccine Bellerophon. If the vaccine is not taken, the skin-corroding virus will melt the flesh from the bones in 27 hours.
Treatment: The Bellerophon vaccine. Although once the public learns that Chimera will melt the flesh off their bones within 27 hours of injection, the price of Biocyte’s antidote’s set to skyrocket.
Odds of survival: Nil. If you are in Sydney, where the virus is aimed. But they should be okay so long as Ethan Hunt’s on the prowl.
The T-Virus
Origin: Resident Evil, 2002
Symptoms: A tickley cough followed by a nasty fever and an unfortunate case of death. Then comes zombification…
Treatment: The key is to avoid swapping bodily fluids with the recently deceased, or to avoid working for a dubious weapons manufacturer. There is a vaccine available, but it’s not available of prescription. It’s kept in a top-secret facility in a subterranean complex.
Odds of survival: Nil. Unless you come back for the sequel!
Thanks to Twentieth Century Fox, Moviehole is giving 5 lucky AUSTRALIAN readers the chance to win a DVD Horror Pack featuring 28 WEEKS LATER and HILLS HAVE EYES 2. To Win, just email Clint and tell him your name, address and another film that featured a deadly Virus.
