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Kick-Ass’s wife to direct Fifty Shades of Grey

Gus Van Sant weeps.

Sam Taylor-Johnson (“Nowhere Boy”) is Universal’s choice to direct celluloid mommy porn, “Fifty Shades of Grey”.

Name ring a bell? It should, she’s the better half of actor Aaron Johnson (“Kick-Ass”).

“Sam’s unique ability to gracefully showcase complex relationships dealing with love, emotion and sexual chemistry make her the ideal director to bring Christian and Anastasia’s relationship to life,” said producer Michael De Luca earlier today. “E L James’ characters and vivid storytelling require a director who is willing to take risks and push the envelope where needed, and Sam is a natural fit.”

Taylor-Johnson, currently developing a film for Columbia based on the book “A Reliable Wife” (so it’s a sex movie too, then?), says she’s stoked, and looks forward to shooting naked bottoms.

“I am excited to be charged with the evolution of Fifty Shades of Grey from page to screen,” she said. “For the legions of fans, I want to say that I will honor the power of Erika’s book and the characters of Christian and Anastasia. They are under my skin too.”

The film is still without a Christian and Anastasia (wonder if hubby Aaron will get a look-in?), but I’m secretly hoping for a Lance Guest/Catherine Mary Stewart “Last Starfighter” reunion. Make it so.

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