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American Pie Presents The Naked Mile (DVD)

If Eugene Levy were a cow, he’d be hoping the farmer had some anti-fungal cream for animals on hand. I mean, he’s been milking this “American Pie” thing so hard; he’s bound to be rashing up by now.


Steve Talley, John White, Candace Kroslak, Angel Lewis, Eugene Levy, Christopher McDonald

If Eugene Levy were a cow, he’d be hoping the farmer had some anti-fungal cream for animals on hand. I mean, he’s been milking this “American Pie” thing so hard; he’s bound to be rashing up by now.

This second direct-to-video instalment in the “American Pie” series again features Levy doing the same old schtik as ‘Jim’s Dad’ – the breakout character of the 1999 original whose since become a staple in the series (Whether it calls for him or not). Thing is, and in this case more than ever, his character has about as much to do with the film as a pastry chef does tomato soup. “I’ve nothing to do with whatsoever”, Levy’s character says in the film. He’s of course referring to the ‘Naked Mile’ run that the film fixes on, but it’s a statement that fits just as beautifully to the his importance to the film.

Granted, Levy’s only here because well, none of the other original stars [of the first three, theatrically-released, films] cared to return. And when Thomas Ian Nichols is knocking back roles, you’ve gotta wonder what blend captain eyebrows was smoking when he read the script. Bottom line : This is a stinker, whoever signed up must’ve been on drugs at negotiation time – hard drugs.

In this one, Erik Stifler, cousin of the infamous rowdy boys Steve (from “American Pie” 1-3) and Matt (from “American Pie : Band Camp”), is struggling to live up to his family name. In short, he’s a nerd. Doesn’t help matters much that he’s never had sex either. In an effort to pop his cherry and experience the wild life, he joins two buddies for the annual ‘Naked Mile’ run that’s being held at his cousin Dwight’s college campus. Its there that Erik gets his first serious taste of boobage.

Oh, and where does Levy come into it? Well, of course, he just happens to 1) attend the same Yoga class as the one that the lead character’s girlfriend does and, b) is the surprise host of the ‘Naked Mile’ college run.

What was so great about “American Pie” is that it was much more than just a teenage sex comedy with bare asses and crude humour – it was smart. It was genuinely funny, too. For every gross-out gag, there was an amusing line to go with.

“Naked Mile” is as far from that genuinely enjoyable film as you could possibly imagine. Gone is the plot, underlying messages about friendships and relationships, and witty humour, and in its place pure smut. Yep, tits … but little else. In 1984, there was a place for films like this. In 2006, the only place for it is on cable TV.

Rating :
Reviewer : Clint Morris

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